Tae Yeon - IF

manyageh naega gandamyeon
naega dagagandamyeon
neon eoddeogeh saenggakhalgga
yonginaelsu eobtgo

manyageh niga gandamyeon
niga ddeonagandamyeon
neol eoddeogeh bonaeyahalji
jaggoo geobi naneun geol

naega babo gataseo
barabolsu bakkeman eobtneungeon amado
wemyeon haljidomoreul ni maeumgwa
ddo keuraeseo deo mareojil saiga dwelggabwa

jeongmal babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

manyageh niga ondamyeon
niga dagaondamyeon
nan eoddeogeh haeyamanhalji
jeongmal alsu eobtneungeol

naega babo gataseo
barabolsu bakkeman eobtneungeon amado
wemyeon haljidomoreul ni maeumgwa
ddo keuraeseo deo mareojil saiga dwelggabwa

jeongmal babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

naega babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

*****************************************************************
If i were to go
If i were to get close to you
What would you think?
I don’t have the courage.
If you were to go,
If you were to leave.
I don’t know how to send you away
It keeps hanging on my mind
I know i am a fool and can only watch you from afar
Your heart may look away from me…
And so we could even become strangers
Just like a fool i can’t even say that i love you because …
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad.
If you were to come
To come near me.
What would i do ?
I really don’t know
Because im like a fool.
Even though i know looking is all i can do
Your heart may look away from me
And so we could even become strangers
Just like a fool i can’t even say that i love you because….
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad
Because i’m like a fool
Even though i can’t say i love you
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad.

我的那棵大树？

今晚，我10点就睡了。。。
心情很差，肚子也很痛。。。
直到现在，3点多了突然醒来。。。
又做噩梦了。。。
可是我却不知道为什么我没有拿起电话打给你。。。

每个女生的心中都希望有一颗大树可以让自己依靠和挡风遮雨。。。
在她流泪下雨的时候，那棵树可以帮她挡雨。。。
在她开心有太阳的时候，那棵树又可以跟他分享。。。
在她彷徨无助的时候，那棵树可以让他无忧无虑的依靠。。。

我的那棵树，到底是不是你？
如果让我找到了我的那棵大树，为什么到现在，我的心情还是那么低落的呢？

现在的我，又要怎样睡回去？

Enjoy ur life...

this is long distance..
u canot juz wan me to sit infront of pc
then i have no life

i dunno y u wan at 10pm?? mayb u noe i got something on 10pm.. then u purposely wan me at 10

say wat u wan
u muz get wat u wan

This is what u said tonite...
Vinc, when did u become like this?
Now I only realized that I don't understand u at all..
Just becos we are long distance relationship, the only connection is only internet...
Did I force u to online for more than 2 hours to acc me per day?
I didn't!!!!
I only want that half hour...
Is it gone too far also?
I made u no life?

10pm, I'm purposely 1?
Can I laugh it loud too???
U promised me u would online @ 10pm, now suddenly u want go out for futsal...
Didn't u feel a bit sorry to me??
No, u didn't!! U even feel that I'm purposely know that u got sth on then date u at this time!!!

I must get whatever I want!??
I'm desperate for love now!!!
Did I go out to find guys for love?!?!?
Why must I cry alone in my room now just becos of u??!

U always say I didn't think before I said...
What about u??!?!

Why have we become like this nowadays?
I thought we would still be a loving couple but all of these...
Have gone...

We are no longer the loving couple when I just came here...
U have ur own life which is without me...
U don't have the time & heart to care about my feeling...

U make me feel that I'm now nothing to ur life...
Even if u online acc me, also make u feel that u have no life at all...

I surrender...
I've tired of these hurt...
Just go ahead for what u eager for...
But not me anymore, right?

Enjoy ur life...

I will learn to go for my life without u...
I will learn to be stronger...
I will learn not to drop my tears so easily..
I will and I will....

我一点安全感都没有...

你已经越来越没有心了，你知道吗？
原本答应10点要上网陪我的，结果你问我可不可以跟他们踢球。。。
我可以说“不可以”吗？？
你的心都已经在那里了，我还能怎样？

就算如此，为什么你却没有想过现在就上网先陪我一下呢？
不知道为什么。。。
我真的感觉不到你真的很爱我。。。
是因为你的行为吗？

我跟你说了那么多，你是否曾经想过为什么我会这样讲？
你有在乎吗？还是你根本就不想理？

我们的blog, 你要多久才会看一次？
看一次，又要看多少篇blog?
我的facebook, 你有会每一天都看吗？
我每一天都一定会update的!!
不管是我们的blog，还是你的facebook~!!!

这就是我们的差别。。。
不要说你没有时间。。。
这一切都是借口，即使多累，按一个keyboard要多久？
看一个blog有要多久？

爱情最重要的是那颗心，你的那颗心呢？
去了哪里？
还在你的q-bar吗？？

你爱我有多少？有多深？
你给我的关心和爱又有多少？
我对你来说真的很重要吗？
我说的每一句话，都会在你心里吗？

我一点安全感都没有...

啦啦啦～～～～

刚刚跟你的谈话，是幸福的，是快乐的～～

我就是圆圆的！！我的宝贝就是喜欢我圆圆的脸！！！^^

不想要去怀疑你对我的爱，所以我可以一直相信你对我的爱吗？

睡不着！睡不着！睡不着！！！！

怎么办？？！？

11/11/2009 = 18 Months

Happy 18 months Anniversary, dd...















14 days more....

过去的他和现在的你。。。

已经两个星期了，我没有一天是开心的，两个星期有14天，你让我流泪的日子就已经有7天了。。。
你会在乎我为你流的眼泪吗？
你不会。。。
你可以表现的若无其事，你可以睡得很安心，甚至隔天还可以当作什么事也没有的来找我。。。
可是我呢？
我除了装作自己没事了还可以怎样？
继续跟你吵架，让我们的感情变淡吗？

你要我谅解你做工的辛苦，那你曾几何时来体谅我的感受呢？
现在的你，已经睡到很甜了，对吗？
那现在和多一下的我呢？
现在的我，眼泪还在流着。。。
等一下的我，一定又是难过的睡不着。。。
你又有在乎过？

一面听着Yiruma的歌，让我想起好多不愉快的过去。。。
最近有人来跟我说了一句话，她说，不要让Vincent像吴语聪那样能对你。。。
此时此刻的我，真的好想放手。。。
有多少次在我最想要放弃的时候，你却提醒了我，我们的梦想在等着。。。
可是，我真的很难受。。。
难受你给的寂寞，难受在我最需要你来让我的眼泪停止的时候你却选择伤我更深。。。

你的心现在在哪里，在想什么，只有你自己最清楚。。。

请你不要再伤害我了，可以吗？
我只想要回我的快乐。。。

Surprise?!?

Just for Joylyn Ho

...

一觉睡醒，什么痛都没有了...
人很不舒服...
也不知道是心在不舒服，还是人真的不舒服...

收到你的sms，你说你一个人在sunway逛...
我的心里不知道为什么会有一种不怎么想要相信你的感觉...
是因为你给的谎言太多了吗？
让我根本就分不清真真假假...

我不是想要放弃这段感情，只是我根本就不懂得怎样原谅你，又要怎样面对你我的将来...
你知不知道，你一次又一次的破灭我对你的信任是一件都么残忍的事情？
我们之间一点一滴，努力建立起的信任，一次又一次的被你破灭...
过后又因为你一个对不起而要我又从新建来起我们之间的信任？
难道你可以肯定我们心中不会有疙瘩吗？

如果换成是我呢？你会那么轻易又再次相信我吗？
此时此刻的我，根本就不懂得要怎样跟你说话，怎样面对你...

感觉越来越淡，心越来越害怕... 只因为你的一个谎言...

真的真的好累... 晚安，再见...

短短这一个星期里，你跟我说过多少次的“对不起”？
哪一次是真心的？哪一次又是虚伪的道歉？
我不懂，一点都不懂！！

别人总是说，一个男人不会让他心爱的女人流泪或难过...
而我呢？这一个星期因为你的一切而自己流泪的次数又是多少？
所以，我根本就不清楚自己在你心中的位置！！！

你说谎，而且说到很离谱...
最难过的是，我明明就已经知道你在撒谎了，却为了给你机会自己跟我说真话，打了多少通电话给你？
可是你却为了要让你的谎言更逼真，更是故意不接我的电话的，对吧？
一通电话，两通电话，三通电话...

我的心越来越冷...越来越害怕...
我最爱的男人竟然跟我说谎话？

你和Louis又有什么差别？
他的谎言是错的，你的谎言难道就是善意的谎言吗？

林辉盛，我不想再提了...
我只想要离开这令人害怕的感情...
因为我不知道，自己什么时候又会再当傻瓜一样，被你骗到团团转！！

我真的好累... 对你... 我再也不会有什么期待了...
也许，22天后，我们见面的那一天，只会像朋友一样的再次见面吧...

真的真的好累... 晚安，再见...

真的后悔了

我真的后悔了。。 我知道我错了。。 请你原谅我。。 我知道我不应该对你撒谎。。 我想现在也没什么好解释的了。。 只是真心的想求你原谅。。 我不是故意的。。 我不想让你生气我不去做工。。

原谅我。。。

再见...

今天你对我撒了一个慌，甚至还演到很逼真，更聪明的你也不听我的电话...

我对你，只有失望可言...
你毁了我们一次又一次建立起来的信任...
我不懂该怎么去相信你，更是再也看不到我们的未来...
我不能跟一个会对我撒谎的男人过一生...
即使是一个小谎言...

你把我以前痛苦的记忆给挖出来...
被他的伤害，似乎跟你现在给我的伤害是一样的...

这是我最后一篇的blog了...

我已经无言了...

对不起，我和你之间... 真的不懂该怎么继续了。。。
我们暂时分开冷静一下吧...
再见...

悔过书

I apologize to my dearest 1..

To my love bb... sorry to make u upset recently... make u lonely.. everytime u told me tat u are lonely.. it make me think of "oh.. izzit u no need me anymore? or some1 juz happen to be around u and bring u happiness and acc u pass the time?? all these thing juz flow in my mind.. i cant stop thinking about it.. so.. here.. i m hoping tat pls dun say u are lonely.. lonely is like desperate.. is like needing love... if u are lonely.. then how bout me? u are not around me too.. i m needing love too...
BB i love you... even though i m not around u.. i am reali counting day by day.. praying that we will have a good time spend together.. i realli dunno wat to pack.. or wat to play overthere.. wat i want is oni you... u really need to listen tat...

I LOVE YOU JOYLYN HO..

...

你根本就不了解我的心...

到现在，你根本就不懂！！！

对不起，晚安。。。

现在的我根本就不懂要用怎样的心情去跟你说话。。。对不起。。。
好好照顾自己吧！

晚安。。。

it is 25days more..

i understand tat i din acc u is my fault.. i understand tat u will angry is my fault.. but do u noe tat i really wan to go home talk to u instead of goin to their house.. i have no money in my wallet.. i cant take taxi home becoz tat time was raining heavily.. i was carrying some undesirable feel to follow them becoz wat roger told me is they will go home after dinner.. then oni watch movie.. so i follow them.. unexpected that they dunwan to go home.. and for a follower.. i cant say anything.. i call u.. and i wish to talk to u but u seems like still slping.. so i wait till u call.. but u already mad when u make the call to me.. it is already 25days left.. i was counting tis from 69days.. finally it arrive around the corner.. i reali dun wish our dream will disappear.. everytime trying to talk nicely to you but end up u are trying to scold me.. so i prefer to keep silent.. along the way i was watching movie.. i notice a couple in front of me.. then they make me think of u straight away.. and our promises of 2012 and flash me with some memories of us during movies... haiz.... this is wat i wanted to share with you... now wat i am hoping is.... pls take care of urself.. pls have ur meal properly.. pls dun hurt urself... stay happily... becoz i aint going out with gals.. i aint hurting you...

PLEASE...... 25days to go

傻瓜...

要怎样说出现在的感受呢？
觉得自己好像傻瓜一样。。。

虽然真的很生气你，但我还是带着等待的心情等着你到家。。。
到现在，已经要晚上了，我都还没有出去吃晚餐。。。
没想到，你的一个sms说你要跟他们喝茶。。。
我楞了一下。。。

你知不知道你真的好过分？
为什么总是要我配合你的时间？
而你却不能呢？

我不懂要怎样跟你互相容忍。。。
因为在你开心的时候，你会想起自己的女朋友可能在等着你吗？可能在很寂寞的心情之下度过一整天吗？
你根本就没有想过吧？

我不能阻止你和你的朋友出去，可是我呢？
难道你是一个星期陪我六天，只有一天是跟朋友出去的吗？
不是。。。
你很忙，忙着做工，没有时间陪我。。。
到家了，就已经很累了，所以要早睡。。。
我什么时候怪过你？

没想到，你连唯一一天的off day都不是把时间用在我身上。。。
为什么总是要我去配合你的时间？
为什么你就不能为了我，做一点事情来让我开心？
你会到家了又怎样？是不是冲凉了，陪我那几十分钟，然后又要睡觉了？
还是要勉强陪我几个小时，然后隔天很累的去做工？
你要我选择哪一个？选择为了等你那几十分钟而等上了一整个下午的时间还是勉强疲惫+没有心的你陪我？

我的心情，你真的了解吗？
我很不开心，真的很想放弃了。。。
写着写着，眼泪就无意间掉下来了。。。
是因为我今天压抑太久了吗？
我真的不想要再付出什么了。。。
因为，我真的累了。。。
我需要的是被爱，被疼，被付出。。。
而不是我一方面一直很爱一个人，一个认为他的付出!!

身不由己 = 给我的寂寞

你唯一一天的off day，我以为你会选择在家里陪我？
可是我起来了才发现，原来不是。。。
我想太多了。。。

对你的失望，你给的寂寞。。。
你又何曾在乎过？

现在的心情，你真的会在乎么？
你所谓的身不由己，就是你给我的寂寞的理由吗？
难道我的寂寞，你就一点责任都没有吗？

我的心越来越模糊了。。。
好希望现在有一个人可以给我一盏灯。。。
告诉我心的方向该往哪里走。。。

我，真的生气了。。。

你今天让我又生气又难过，你知道吗？
我从来都没有怪你做工做到那么晚。。。
我只是觉得。。。
你难得今天做到8点而已，为什么就不能陪我多些时间呢？
为什么要跟朋友出去到十一点多，然后还要打game呢？
过后的时间才陪我？
意思就是说，你跟朋友出去和打game的时间都一定会多过陪我的时间？

我不懂哦。。。
就算你知道我真的生气了，你也可以因为你不想吵架所以就当作什么都没有发生的去睡觉。。。
那在这里的我呢？
自己生气？自己心情不好？自己难过吗？
还是不应该对你有那么多期待呢？

我，真的生气了。。。

真的很期待

宝贝。不是我不想陪你，也不是我不想早点回家。我每天做到12点都是因为我想多存点钱然后带到英国和你一起开开心心的玩。你总是说我不关心你难到我不会难过吗？我很想很想天天陪着你，我比你更期待在英国的日子所以我才会每天工作到那么晚。我没有钱。我在期待的是可以陪着你的一个月而不是在英国的一个月。你明白吗？

在等着爱人回家。。。

最近，我的爱人经常很晚才到家。。。
不是因为搞外遇，是因为他要做工。。。

一回到家，他有好多事情要忙。。。
冲凉，吃饼干，喝美禄。。。
聊一下下，他就要睡觉了。。。

这样的日子好无聊啊。。。
不过，我还有很多事情陪着我。。。
那就是我的功课。。。
因为宝贝就要来找我了，所以有很多功课我一定要尽快赶完。。。

再多一个月，我跟宝贝就可以见面了。。。
爱人啊爱人，你真的有很期待吗？
会不会来了之后，我们又经常吵架啊？
跟你说哦。。。不准跟我吵架！！
飞机票很贵，所以要好好珍惜在一起的一个月。。。
因为不知道这一个月过后，我们还要等多久才可以见面啊。。。
就算我闹小姐脾气，你还是要让我的啊！
谁叫你是男人～～哈哈！

好无聊～好无聊~~~~~~~

在等着爱人回家。。。

好累。。。

我需要的是被爱，很多很多的爱。。。
我需要的是在我难过或流眼泪的时候，你会陪着我，做些事情让我开心起来。。。
这些都是我曾经在你身上得到的。。。
而现在，这一切都不再拥有了。。。
只因为，你我已经忘了当初的约定。。。

心，真的好累好累。。。
除了爸爸妈妈给我的爱以外，我的人生都是得对身边的人付出的命。。。
我真的好想幸福的被爱，被疼。。。
眼泪不停的流。。。
这不是我想要的。。。
今晚，你又再次说出要我去找别人的话出来了。。。
也许你不知道，这就是我眼泪不停的流的原因吧。。。

好累。。。

BB ar... my love 1....

Bad dream is not goin to happend unless u wan it to happend... i wan you to noe tat i m here... my heart is be with you all the time... but oni my body is apart from you... so whenever u have bad dream... u have to tell youself about this... "my dd love me" Vinc Love JOY... i love you... 30days then we can meet each other ady... lets put down the worries... and i will be there for u... hug you.. kiss you... okay bb?? becoz i love you...

恶梦。。。

我做了一个很坏很坏的梦。。。
我的梦是流了很多很多的眼泪的。。。
起来的时候，我的baby gosh是湿湿的。。。

到了这一刻我才知道，原来语聪给我的伤害是有多么的深。。。
一直以为已经遗忘了那个伤口，原来真的是一辈子都忘不了的。。。

我梦到了“我跟你吵架了，我们连续一个星期没有联络对方。。。
知道，我从我朋友口中听到你牵着一个很清秀的女孩子在路上走着。。。
当我打电话给你的时候，你才说“你对我已经没有感觉了，分手吧！””

亲爱的，我知道这只是个梦，但是我不知道为什么自己会这样。。。
可是，我可以告诉你的是，我来这里一个多月了，我都是过着开心的日子。。。
只因为，你给我的快乐多过悲伤了。。。

谢谢你。。。

现在的心情是复杂的。。。只希望这个恶梦离我远远，远远的。。。
我只想要幸福的日子。。。与你。。。

Careful all the minutes, seconds....

DD ah.. Feel like scolding u loud loud!
Seriously, I am really really worried about u especially whenever u ride motor...
Not becos I don't trust u or no confident on u...
I'm just scared...
People around me, no matter I know or not...
Leave this world one by one...
The moment just now u didn't pick up my call, my heart was really worried...
I dunno wat happened to u...
I keep telling myself u will be fine u will be fine...
Until the moment I receive ur sms, I only put down my worries...
I'm not around u now, wat about if 1 day u suddenly left me in this world? (CHOI!)
I think I couldn't survive that time...

So, can promise me to be careful all the time!?
We are still going to have our future, isnt it?!

I love u, darl... =)

Love Paradise just like how I love you...

1 month has gone...

What do u think of the design of our blog? Nice?
It's 2.27am now, I'm gonna sleep soon...

DD, I'm here for 1 month already...
Time flies fast, isn't it?

I know that it's not easy for us to maintain long distance relationship...
But I believe in our beliefs...
The beliefs that holding in our hand, our heart and our love...

The day will be reaching soon, we will be meeting very soon again...
I miss ur hug, ur kiss, ur smile, ur everything!!!

Babe, I love u so much... Even now, this feeling has not change at all...

Good nite, babe...

Announcement for our blog!!

Babe, I've just updated and edited our blog.. Hope u will like it..

I moved one of my first blog which I wrote in UK into here as I'm gonna close that blogger and starts from now on, I will only update my blog here, okay?

I've just found out a song that is quite nice & sweet...

And I've already added into our blog too...

Hope u will like it too!!

There you are, the lyrics...

----> Officially Missing You

All I hear is raindrops
Falling on the rooftop
Oh baby tell me why’d you have to go
Cause this pain I feel
It wont go away
And today I’m officially missing you
I thought that from this heartache
I could escape
But I fronted long enough to know
There ain’t no way
And today
I’m officially missing you

Oh can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do
Hey baby say it stays on my mind
And I, I’m officially

All I do is lay around
Two ears full of tears
From looking at your face on the wall
Just a week ago you were my baby
Now I don’t even know you at all
I don’t know you at all
Well I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess it’s safe to say baby safe to say
That I’m officially missing you

Well I thought I could just get over you baby
But I see that’s something I just can’t do
From the way you would hold me
To the sweet things you told me
I just can’t find a way
To let go of you


It official
You know that I’m missing you
Yeah yes
All I hear is raindrops
And I’m officially missing you

My first blog for u when I'm 6500 miles far away from YOU!!!

Darling... I know u are sleeping now...
I finally had my dinner and just reached home...
It's really freaking' cold here!
Can't really have a perfect timing to accompany u today, I'm so sorry...
I guess u had a great night with Roger to have dinner in Kim Gary, right?
I seldom receive ur sms oh, will u forget me one day? (Scary...)
I think I will try to get a new number in Aberdeen tmmr when I reach there...
I will give u a call straight away after I got the number yeah!

DD... Tell u something secretly... I dropped a few tears in the plane last night...
Cos' I think of u...
When the moment I went into the gate, u kissed my lip...
I can tell that u don't bear me even though u didn't say anything...
U asked me to wait for u to come UK on November...
With these words, my heart and I are waiting for u...
Can't wait November to be here...

I want to go London with u, I want to go Manchester with u, I want to go... .... WITH YOU!!!

Baby, I know we are miles and miles away from one another, but I always believed that as long as our souls are connected to each other, the flame of our love will burn forever.

Baby, I miss u so so so much right now!!! I love you...

All to all is all about you~

To my Dearest one...
i regret that we had so many quarrel.. i m sorry that i lost my temper.. i should keep it within myself becoz i m a man.. i have to becoz i m ur man.. but i did not.. You are so important to me right now.. i m waiting for you to come back.. i m hoping to have future with you.. therefore.. i really need u to understand.. i din do anything wrong to u.. i m under control.. so i wan u to put down ur worries... becoz ur worries will become my guilty.. even though i m innocent.. my oni entertainment is oni futsal.. nothing else.. u said u have become more n more lonely becoz i m not around u... then how bout me?? have u think of me?? m i lonely too?? YES! i am... but i m looking forward to u.. Loneliness is all bout u.. This is long distance.. u are more experiences than me.. but how i goin to survive if u failed half way?? 43 days more then we can meet each other.. 43 days more then we can stay together for 1 month.. i keep telling myself i dunwan any bad thing to happend during tat 1month.. i avoid bad thing during this 43days... actually is starting from 69days..

About your friend.. i reali feel sorry to you.. many ppl around u happend to turn up in another way.. but mayb u can rmb 1 thing.. human nature used to b selfish.. especially Chinese.. but i believe that this is not a thing to fell u down the ground.. hopefully u can sort out another solution.. this is a vy good lesson for you to see wat is HUMAN..

Please keep urself healthy and safely.. i dun wish u to happen anything.. i m not around you.. so u have to take good care of urself..

I love you... i will be right here waiting..

我，真的是你的最爱吗？

亲爱的，我开始感到寂寞了，你感觉得到吗？
我不反对你做你想做的事情，可是...
有时候我真的很羡慕我的朋友们...
她们的男朋友不管等她们等到多晚，总是会等到她们到家...
我并没有要比较，只是不明白...
我要的有很多吗？我只是要你专心地跟我说话，哪怕只有半个小时？
我们是沉默的，似乎没有话题说...
我很努力的在找话题，就好像刚才...
我为什么叫你去facebook看我朋友的洋人男朋友？
是无聊吗？还是八卦？
我只是在努力的找话题，你可以感觉得到吗？
你有感觉到我的累吗？
我的心很累...
很寂寞的心情，你可以了解吗？
我不喜欢每一天睡觉前都带着不愉快的心情睡觉...

这是我来到英国流泪的第二次...
我开始感到越来越辛苦了...
在朋友面前，我必须装作坚强...
每天都开开心心的笑...
甚至跟你吵架，让自己很不愉快，都要偷偷摸摸...
有时候被小汇他们听到，都要假装不在乎...
我的心好痛，谁又可以来救它？
这是我们的第二个家？你又多久来一次了呢？
你真的在乎我吗？真的对我的思念有那么深吗？
还是你已经习惯我不在你身边的日子了？
我越来越模糊了，越来越不懂我们之间的爱情了...

眼泪，还是流着...
我们之间的爱情呢？会不会也这样被眼泪冲淡了一切？
当你看到这篇blog的时候，你会有什么样的心情？
现在的我，心是痛着，泪是流着... 你又知道吗？

我可以放手吗？我可以停止这一切了吗？我可以努力的防止我又在受多一次的伤害了吗？我可以刻意的不让历史重演在我身上了吗？我不懂...我什么都想不通...

眼泪啊眼泪，你可不可以停止了？能不能就坚强和潇洒一点？

伤心的夜晚...

亲爱的！今天心情不好所以想写blog一下...

嗯... 我终于看到“人终究是自私“的情况了...

我们已经开学第二个星期了，也要开始找partner来grouping了...

Sharon & Li Hsia 觉得参自己人presentation等于自杀，所以就马上找其他洋人一组了...

知道吗？最后的结果超好笑的...

找到最后，没有组的竟然是我们自己人...

我和小汇（因为这几天都感冒了，今天就没有去lecture class... 所以并不知道情况...) 竟然没有group...

Hospitality只有16个人，所以我们两个不知道可以参谁... 拿出来讨论的时候，也没有人真的在乎，因为自己都已经有group了...

自己人不要参自己人的唯一原因就是...

觉得自己人会害死自己人...

英文问题，思想问题，etc...

我们自己人真的有那么丢脸吗？

也许他们是对的，但是对我而言...我们是一起过来的朋友，不是更应该团结吗？

他们会说班上的四个荷兰人有自己的group了，所以不要找别人...

这就是所谓的朋友，不是吗？

我有点模糊了...

今晚的心情是，失望的...

唉... 伤心的夜晚！

DD... 读读看吧！

其实很多男孩子都不知道，

女孩子在冲他们发火后自己转过身却在不断啜泣。

其实很多男孩子都不知道，

女孩子从来不会真正去生他们的气，因为她是真的喜欢他在乎他。

其实很多男孩子都不知道，女孩子只会对自己喜欢的男生唠唠叨叨，

也只会对自己喜欢的人耍性子。

你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，她根本不会来在乎你关心你，怕你做错事情。

你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，她根本不会对你发火不会冲你撒娇让你哄她，

在别人面前她都是淑女。

你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，你根本就没有本事让她哭泣，

让她即使生气也不会超过2天。

而这一切都只是因为她喜欢你，而这一切都因为你还不够在意她不够懂她。

　　
于是，你们时常争吵，你认为她脾气不好，她认为你不够迁就她。

于是，你们总是冷战，你以为她不喜欢你，她以为你不在乎她。

于是，你们总是莫名其妙的彼此错过，也许擦身而过，本身就是一种悲伤着的无奈与幸福。
　　
要知道，凄美依然是美的一种，并且美的绚丽悲凉而沧桑，那是更加的美。

因为她喜欢你，所以她偶尔冲你发火，时常对你撒娇。

因为她喜欢你，所以她才会生你的气；

而又因为喜欢你，她才不会去生气很久。

你可知道，每个女孩子的心都是水晶做的，晶莹剔透，但是很容易就碰伤摔碎。

你可知道，每个女孩子都是不设防的，你那么轻易就闯进她的心，走的时候却只留下伤害。

她从来都不知道，这个世界上根本没有可以让她哭的人，

因为真正值得她哭的那个根本舍不得让她哭。

她会很矜持，
她会很骄傲，
她会很冷淡，
她总是嘴里说着你走开，心里却一直叫你留下。

你了解女孩吗?
　　
请你张开你的耳朵，
也请你打开你的心，
去听她心里真正的呼唤，
而不是她嘴里的口是心非。

她会看着你转身，然后她跟着你转身，当侧身而过的时候，

你看不见她的泪，滂沱在脸上心里。

如果你喜欢她，请你多陪她；
如果你喜欢她，请你多宠她；
如果你喜欢她，请你多让她。
如果你喜欢她，请你去听听她内心的声音，那是呐喊——请拥抱她。


在爱情里，总是彼此伤害，彷佛这样才能证明自己爱得激烈爱到轰轰烈烈。

可是，爱情里没有孰对孰错；

爱情里更加没有你比我多我比你少。

你爱她，她爱你，如此就已经足够。

不要试图让彼此的伤害，让彼此更加脆弱悲伤。

你们彼此相爱，你们需要的是温暖是幸福是甜蜜是快乐，不是伤害。

不要用沉默宣战，不要互不相让，

更不要什么话都不讲就冷漠离去。

要知道，你离去的时候，你的眼睛起了雾，她的眼角泛着泪光。

越是安静战火就越深，这是冷战也是彼此的伤害——

无论是怎么的复合，那些伤口曾经存在，抹不去。

请跟她一个拥抱，用你的拥抱去化解她心里的悲伤与眼角的泪水。

她喜欢你，她绝对不会拒绝你的拥抱，她只会害怕你的冷漠转身无声安静。　
　　　
请记住，相爱的人不要轻易宣战，因为冷战带来的伤害，超出你的预计。

也请记住，只要你喜欢她，没有什么是你接受不了的，

只要你喜欢她，就喜欢她的一切一切。

那么她所有的小性子所有的坏脾气所有的臭毛病，在你眼里都是撒娇。

也请记住，她喜欢你，她需要的不是你真的转身，她嘴里说着的也不是她的真心话。

她只是想你宠她，想你抱她，哪怕，没有道歉。

Upset? Feel bad? Selfish...???

DD...

I'm so upset after reading ur blog...
I guess u are suffering now, right?
Suffered of miserable, lonely, bored...

I know u are trying so hard waiting for me...
I started to be confused...
Am I too selfish?
I'm enjoying my life here everyday and u are suffering there everyday too to being alone sometimes...
My heart feels pain whenever u tell me that no one go for dinner with u...
I was always beside u... Whenever u were hungry, bored, lonely... I was there with u...
But now, I couldn't be there for u whenever u need me...

I'm truly sorry, darling...
I trust u... and I miss u badly too...
Even though we couldn't meet each other, I believe that our heart is holding tight for each other, right?

U really mean a lot to me...
I miss u... I love u...

Sweet dream, darling...

By,
Joy Joy BB~

Life sucks without you

i dun have idea to start blogging anymore.. especially this topic... wat i wan to express is i really miss you my love... 65days more then we can see each other and we may stick together for 1month.. but the challenge is 65days... is seems to be a long time to come.. I am sorry for not giving you any surprise when u were leaving to uk.. for me.... the most surprise is we can stay together.. life reali sucks without you.. btw... i will keep holding on until the 66th days and so on...
BB.. the little babies has gone up to be bigger ady.. i will upload the picture once i capture a perfect 1... but the mummy was vy CRAZY... i think she eaten the other 2 pities... and last night nearly kill another 1 too.... reali pray that the 4babies will be healthier and saver...

I miss you bb.... real missing of you..... I love you..

To u, Vinc DD...

DD... This is my first blog for u in ur blog...
I suddenly feel so so so sorry to u...
I am sorry I couldn't be the first to be with u when u need someone to accompany u to talk...
Perhaps our distance is really getting far and far away now, but please..
Trust me... U are still remain the same important in my heart!

Baby, I am worried that the history will be happened to me again...
But I know u are trying ur best to give me happiness...
I'm looking forward to meet u in Aberdeen soon...
I believe we will have a happy moment for 1 month...

Baby, I love u...

By,
Joy Joy BB~

Letter of Apologies

To Joylyn Ho:

I, Lim Vincent here to apologize to you for my RUDE temper and out of control's anger which made you felt so bad lately and create ur sadness. I am sincerely apologize to you and hope that u will forgive me. What written was written, i can't delete it even through i delete from this blog but it still remain in our heart. I really do not wan the gals to hurt you. At first i really tot she will be just a fren. I smoke is because i got someone to talk to when during smoking. Just now i really hope u can overnight here at least night time we can have a nice talk somemore tmr i dun have to work. but i do not expect that u have to go back bp straight away. I am sorry.

Vincent
01.15am, 8th September 2009.

The last post

I m sorry.. i try to blogging is becoz i want us to have a space to express feeling.. that y i named it "Our Second Home".. but i think i will stop all these right now... i reali have enof.. u r non stop repeating the same thing.. you reali canot wait for our important day.. which is i keep counting down... but i will stop that right now.. Everytime oso like tis... reali cant wait for my surprise.. EVERYTIME!!!!! Sorry that i keep saying u fan.. but i am real FAN! Stop calling me...

Esther... hahaha.... did she send u our chat log? she oni talk to u and tell u nonsense.. u believe her?? i think u do believe her!! if not u wont blame me... Dun tell me u never blame me! bullshit!
i will send u the chat log and u will read!

This will be my last posting.. seems that u cant wait for time to come.. i will show it to u right now!

Here.. i reali wan to have a break.. Lets stop everything right now.. Joylyn Ho.. I WANT TO BREAK UP..

I m not a follower...

Now i understand why both same characteristic of couple is really vy difficult to be together and last long.. Both of us are same! You are a leader.. u can be leader within ur sister gang.. u can make decision for them and u can deny their suggestion.. BUT in my relationship i will be the leader.. i dun like ppl to order me things.. i wan to lead ppl... i give decision.. specially in relationship.. i wan my gf to listen to me.. i wan my gf to follow me... i wan my gf to be a small lady.. NOT she ordering me.. walk infront of me.. I noe ur characteristic use to be tat way.. but if u reali canot change it... same thing will keep happening and please dun blame again n again..

My girl friend please DO NOT do the following:
1. Repeating the same thing
2. Not allow me to acc my fren
3. Ask me to do this n that
4. Do not listen to me
5. Act pro
6. If i ask her to keep quiet please do so..

Thank you very much..

5more days.. but it seems like goin to be 500years

5more days.. only 5more days.... then i am able to show u all the surprise... but why u choose this time to quarrel with me? i m reali a bad temper guy... but why my gf juz dunwan to listen to me?? why u dunwan to wait for 11th?? why u wana ask me to go sentosa?? urself noe is impossible for me to go.. but y u wanna make urself feel dissapointed?? like i m letting u down?? WHY???

Today i acc my frens because they are leaving tmr ady.. i juz hope to have more time with them.. but u blame me that i never care of u.. dun have ur heart... dun love u anymore.... What u wan me to reply u?? i said u are sorry... i noe its not totally ur fault... but i juz want my gf to listen to me... follow wat i say... not she wants me to follow her.... i told u i wanted to acc my fren but i dun understand why u still have so much to talk?! i dunwan to talk ady is because my fren sitting beside me are listening to wat we talk... and they laugh~ maybe laugh at me... But WHY I SAID PLS HANG UP.. THEN U STILL CALL TO Roger!!!!!! This is wat make me dam pissed off!!! call to other hp to find me!!! u think this is vy funny??!!!

Now is 5.17am 6.9.09.. i juz reach home.. actually i wanted to come home at 12.30am to have a nice slp then go to work in the morning.. but after we quarrel.. i have no mood at all.. i decided to take mc for 3days... sunday is because impossible for me to work ady... is almost time now.. and i not yet slp.. monday nothing special.. tuesday is because i m goin to settle ur car issue.. frankly speaking.. i reali regret to drive ur car... make me so troublesm.. But wat happened is already happened.. i cant deny it... this is my decision..

Another thing i wanted to tell u is......... i smoke ady.... all the thing that happened and because of boring.. i start smoking in the hotel..

Goin to slp ady.. nitez..

""i'm sorry i said the words
i'm sorry i hurt u
i'm sorry to be regret
i just need ur love so much esepcially after sijie's thing... u know when the moment she tells me u n her matter? i dunno how to answer her.. i suffer these by myself...
i din want u 2 feel tat i dun trust u..
pls dun treat me like tat way, i feel so hurt...
my heart is so painful now...
u scolded me, shouted at me, say so many things hurt my heart so deeply... i dun even know how to cope wif these...
i really feel like dying
love can be sweet but can be cruel also...
i'm sorry
if u still want to break up wif me, i will accept... just let me know by tmmr...""

i dunno how to reply u this...

Very Important Princess~

VIP= very important princess..?????!@#@!$
princess coming to my hotel?? lol.... of coz not la... how i wish to tell u that why tmr is vy important.. but.. u have to noe.. that is a secret+surprise.. so.. pls forgive me ya...
Here, i tell u the truth.. my VIP= to you= my BB= my important princess... Tmr i m goin to prepare ur present for our anniversary... understand better now?? lol.... "which country's princess?" (wanna laugh loud loud ^^) . For more information pls read the following post.. thank you..

8days more~ tmr will be a important day..

BB.. how are u today?? it was raining juz was when i wanted to come back from hotel..
I am vy excited during the whole day.. noe why? because tmr is my OFF DAY.. and this off day has pack with my schedule.. morning i need to go gym.. then afternoon i will go shopping... at night maybe have dinner with fren.. i noe u sure angry when u read until here.. u sure scolding "go gym la... go shopping with frenz.. enjoy without me.... dinner with fren again.... good la.. no need me ady... " izzit?? but... the reason i m goin to shop is to get u anniversary present.. which you are waiting n waiting until ur neck become longer n longer d..

BB.. today i met a guest in my hotel restaurant.. he is from uk.. and we talk about i m goin to Scotland around this november.. and he remind me to wear at least 4x cloth... he said he had been to Scotland for a few times.. the place is FREEZING~~ during winter... i said is it vy cold? he reply me.. vy vy vy cold... when i experience that weather.. i will tell myself.. "forget about Scotland~". Therefore.. i decided to get u a thick scarf and a hat.. but to get a nice looking 1 is not tat easy+not that cheap.. so i reali pray for tmr that i m able to get 1 for u..

9days to go~

9 days to go.... where?? many ppl asked me this question.. but i never give them the answer.. i keep tat in myself.. because i m looking forward for the day 10th..
Today i wake up late in the morning.. around 630am.. but luckily got a fren who is able to send me to Traders.. along the way to my working place.. i was thinking.. why i cant wake up in the morning.. even through i have set double alarm.. Last night i woke up from my dream with a shock of my hp rang.. by that time, i tot it was ady 530am.. but after 1-2mins.. i slowly recover from the shock and i was trying hard to get my hp which was juz beside me... i realize tat it was oni 1am which mean i oni slp for 2hours.. then i continue slp until i miss my alarm..

Today.. we have more to talk to.. i heard from xiao hui that u were food poisoning and diarrhea the whole day.. i start worry bout ur stomach.. then i took the initiative to ask u.." are u okay? heard that u are sick" then slowly we got more to chat.. i think now u are ady in my house.. according to my mum.. u are goin to visit them before u go oversea.. on d other hand.. u told me that my mum asked u to collect some donation.. but i m fine.. as long as we talk..

I have finally read the page which u wrote on my diary "un-authorizely".. the date was stated 7th august.. i found out this page accidentally when i realize that i have long time never record my daily note.. 1st open up is ady a small note " baby.. pls forgive me write in ur book.. bcoz i do not noe the better place which you will look around when you are free.. hope u read every page sincerely.. lao po.. joyjoy". After that i started to read every page.. every word.. i do not noe whether u copy paste or u came out urself.. but i read it sincerely.. 7.8.2009... 8.8.2009... until the last note.. "Darling, Love is the shortest distance between Hearts... BB joy²"

Now i really wanna tell u something... "bb.. i miss u..."

This is my 1st blog for YOU

This is the 1st and ever blog in my life... previously i never think of blogging like right now and blogging for me is like wasting of time.. i rather use the time for gaming either sleeping..
The reason why i wanted to start blogging because i realize that there were alot.. too much of hard feeling that keep inside my heart but cant express to any1 else especially my closest 1.. No 1 understand me...
Good friend? i ever think of this.. i dun reali know how many good fren tat i have.. wats the different between fren and good fren? the 1 who i took as a good fren.. din really consider me as his good fren.. i was sad... i cant do anything..
Girl friend? currently i have a gal friend but she is goin to oversea.. leaving in another 16days..
she is worried about our future.. she said tat she is lonely.. her bf dun care bout her.. her bf dun share her daily life.. her bf hurt her again n again.. her bf ignore her when she is down.. WAT KIND OF BF IS THIS??!
I admit that i am not a perfect lover.. i love myself.. i put myself in the 1st place sometime.. i like to mix with my friends.. (maybe i have less friend).. i dun think i reali suitable for holding a relationship.. i wanted to change for her... but i lose to myself.. my own attitude.. i am a loser... BIG loser in everything!!!! EVERYTHING...
I hope to share my life with you through this blog... perhaps it will work better way..